entering the mission field...everywhere.

My name is Pride. I am a cheater.

I cheat you of your God-given destiny
because you demand your own way.
I cheat you of contentment
because you "deserve better than this."
I cheat you of knowledge
because you already know it all.
I cheat you of healing
because you're too full of me to forgive.
I cheat you of holiness
because you refuse to admit when you're wrong.
I cheat you of vision
because you'd rather look
in the mirror than out a window.
I cheat you of a genuine friendship
because nobody's going to know the real you.
I cheat you of love
because real romance demands sacrifice.
I cheat you of greatness in heaven
because you refuse to wash another's feet on earth.
I cheat you of God's glory
because I convince you to seek your own.

My name is Pride. I am a cheater.
You like me because you think I'm always looking out for you.
Untrue. I'm looking to make a fool of you.
God has so much for you, I admit, but don't worry.
If you stick with me, you'll never know.

but i do know. i do recognize this sin that entangles me (Hebrews 12). i recognize its stronghold within my life--especially when i think that i have everything "under control." i recognize how it is hindering me from living fully in the freedom paid by the cross and in the grace by His resurrection. but what am i going to do about that?

"let me ask you something. if someone prays for patience, you think God gives them patience? or does He give them the opportunity to be patient? if he prayed for courage, does God give him courage, or does He give him opportunities to be courageous? if someone prayed for the family to be closer, do you think God zaps them with warm fuzzy feelings, or does He give them opportunities to love each other?"

Father, i pray for opportunity. to see opportunities that come forth. to be obedient to Your will for me and to do what You have me doing in those opportunities. to embrace those opportunities as blessings to You and Your kingdom. to not fear the unknown of what those opportunities stand for. to do and not just read Your word.

spring break is near. i'm going north. i'm going home. after spring break, it's less than 6 weeks until the end of the semester and the start of another adventure. i'm psyched for war eagle and kanakuk--and the Lord is going to bless me immensely with getting out of the comfort zone and to gain perspective of how big His kingdom is & how He's letting me see a glimpse of it in a new way. hallelujah.

pray for the living situation next year, for perseverance throughout this semester, and for students being sent out this spring break in sharing Christ's name. love you.

"our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. it is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. your playing small does not serve the world. there is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. we are all meant to shine as children do. it's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. and as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. as we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
(one more to ponder about.)